Fear and Frustration

I was going to only title this post “Fear,” and write about how hard it has been to finish up my worksheet generator project, because I knew I was close to having something finished that I could show to my friends and colleagues and get them to beta test it.

I had a timeline — I’d have the website up by the end of the week, show it to a close friend and fellow teacher next week — and be using it by the weekend, while soliciting other beta users. By Christmas, I wanted to be running Google ads.

Fear

The basic premise of this post was planned in a few parts:

  • Pointing out that I often talked about just wanting to have something finished
  • Talking about how it feels to tell people, as an unqualified EFL teacher, that you’re working on a coding project
  • A brief summary of the challenges of converting a project that had been working in Tkinter into a Django application
  • And, last but not least, the surprising feeling of having to force myself to do the things that needed to be done to get the project ‘ready for deployment.’

It was strange to not want to work on the project. But I’d set myself a deadline and my classes will be starting back up. I want to use the website version.

With a bit of time and reflection, I realized that I was afraid of the next steps. Soon, I’d be exposing myself to the possibility of learning that other people don’t think my app is amazing. How strange.

Knowing that, it was easier to push through it. Which brings us to part two of today’s post.

Frustration

I don’t know why I think of Django development as ‘simple,’ what with the heartache and frustration I’ve experienced. Partly, I suppose, it’s because each of the problems I’ve had has been solvable though Stackoverflow and patience. And, probably, because they mostly amounted to me making a silly mistake.

And then I tried to deploy my app.

It was working fine, using the development server on my notebook and, even though it would be a long time before I ran out of tweaks to add, it was time.

So, I did the following:

  1. Paid for an account at Github
  2. Bought the domain I wanted on hover.com
  3. Paid for an account at Linode
  4. Spent hours in telnet and with various tutorials
  5. Paid for an account at djangoeurope.com
  6. Went back to experimenting with Linode, because there are more tutorials specifically for them
  7. Opened some red wine
  8. Seriously considered no longer coding
  9. Googled ‘django deployment’ just once more
  10. Realized I probably ought to be blogging rather than doing this

The power of words

Now that I’m on my second glass of wine and have been thinking about it for a while, I realize that I’m confronted with two problems:

  1. I don’t know anything about servers, of what I have to do to get them working
  2. I don’t know what I don’t know about servers, in order to google it.

That’s the thing about coding, half the battle is just knowing what the coding community calls the thing you’re trying to do. Once you know that, you can use some patience and elbow grease to get it going.

But now? Now I’m stuck. And I’m frustrated.

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